Time heals

Hi,

I am pretty sure I start with "Hi, it's been a while"  in every blog post. Here's the thing. I'm busy and creatively unmotivated. Not that there are many still come over to this site anyway. This blog is created primarily for me to let stories that hurt me out of my system. It takes time for me to be ready to let them go. But here we are, on today's episode of what hurt me we have: middle school days.

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I have touched on my middle school days here and there on this blog but here's the story. Those days were pretty splendid. I did very well academically. Retrospectively, I was probably one of those annoying kids who were very grade-orientated. Here's the twist, I pretended like I didn't care. Because only losers would care about their grades, am I right? I finished middle school grading in maybe the top 3 of the students that year. Oh, we love the glory that only lasted 2 months here. It went downhill quickly when I started high school but that's a story for another day.

I had a group of friends. I wouldn't say it was the healthiest friendship but I loved those days when we were together. I still have a soft spot for them now. We grew apart from each other naturally. We all went to different high schools and then I moved to the US. It was inevitable. I once half-jokingly said that even many years later, we would still be best friends. It has not been that many years later but we are not best friends anymore. We are just friends and I am ok with that. Initially, when I first realized that things have changed and the bond we once had wasn't here anymore, I was depressed. Also partly because at that time, I was alone in the US and I barely had any friends (I still don't). I think oftentimes we idolize long-lasting friendship. But relationships are never meant to last in the first place. It would be nice if they last but they don't have to last to be meaningful. Friendship, especially at such a young age, is precious because it is fragile. It isn't very change-endurant. Sometimes beauty doesn't lie in the things that last but rather in the things that don't. Such as youth. Such as friendship. Such as happiness. Such as us all. 

Time can't heal. It only creates gaps between pains. 

Healing doesn't lie in time. It lies in the opportunity time gives us to better ourselves. 

But a part of me still stays in the mornings when we were still classmates.