Daily rant_ Giving up
I think it's been quite gloomy recently on this tiny little blog. I can blame the rain but if I am completely honest, it's because my life has been more than just gloomy recently. Have it ever been "not gloomy" on this tiny little blog? On that note, I think it'll be fitting to continue this series with another gloomy topic, "giving up".
I want to specify that the "giving up" here I'm referring to isn't "the giving up on life" or "the giving up on a test" etc. I want to talk about giving up on people, beliefs and ideas you once laid your trust in.
As I mentioned in another blogpost, there was a recent incident that made me reconsider a lot of things. I think at one point I was torn between "the time we spent together" and "who we are now". It takes effort to continue a relationship that is more or less dead. I think we, as a group of "friends", "best friends" even, felt that the bond we had were long broken before the incident. Just like me, they were probably having a hard time giving up on each other, giving up on me and giving up on our friendship.
I was the one ended it. There was a tremendous amount of guilt. There was a tremendous amount of sorrow. There was a tremendous amount of burden.
And then there was me, the one who gave up.
I think the burden of giving up comes from time and affection, the two things that make we are who we are.
I felt betrayed, abandoned and lost.
When you have no reason left to believe in people who were once dear to your heart and in ideas which you were once passionate about; you'll feel helpless. Because of the time you invested and how much you cared, it's heartbreaking to give up. All of those years traded for a moment of despair. You'd feel as if you wasted half of your life on something which doesn't even last or somebody that took you for granted.
Your trust collapsed
Then, you collapsed
But maybe it's for the better.
And it takes time to get to "the better".
And maybe the beauty doesn't lay in the things that last but in those that don't.
I want to specify that the "giving up" here I'm referring to isn't "the giving up on life" or "the giving up on a test" etc. I want to talk about giving up on people, beliefs and ideas you once laid your trust in.
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| Kodak colorplus 200 |
I was the one ended it. There was a tremendous amount of guilt. There was a tremendous amount of sorrow. There was a tremendous amount of burden.
And then there was me, the one who gave up.
I think the burden of giving up comes from time and affection, the two things that make we are who we are.
I felt betrayed, abandoned and lost.
When you have no reason left to believe in people who were once dear to your heart and in ideas which you were once passionate about; you'll feel helpless. Because of the time you invested and how much you cared, it's heartbreaking to give up. All of those years traded for a moment of despair. You'd feel as if you wasted half of your life on something which doesn't even last or somebody that took you for granted.
Your trust collapsed
Then, you collapsed
But maybe it's for the better.
And it takes time to get to "the better".
And maybe the beauty doesn't lay in the things that last but in those that don't.
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